its the end of the practicum. many lessons learnt amidst the burning and searing of mind, intellect and emotions. its easy to be disappointed, demoralised and depressed by the mistakes made. but then again, who doesn't make mistakes? think the more important question as so many have said before: have we learnt from our mistakes?another issue that follows is whether mistakes are held against you.

oh well, this is a reflective exercise and it shouldn't be one that rails against the rationality i'm in, where i'm. yes, its tough work unweeding the garden of one's soul against the root of bitterness and disappointment but as a good pastor once said: 'we have to be on guard against the world, the devil and the flesh.' the message couldn't have come at a more opportune time. but yeah, you can forgive and move on but its hard to forget. much so like a bad wine that stays in your mouth. yeah, no prizes for guessing: eaglehawk merlot. hahahahah... only fit for cooking.

anyways, back to the reflection. i think that there is a time for everything under the sun and that God has a plan for everyone, sinners and saints included. its been a blessing of-sorts to have been re-exposed to the foul stench and language of Mordor that pervades Middle-Earth. Of which, whose language i shall not utter here (just to quote Gandalf Greyhame). Hehehe. Good reminder that it is necessary to be wary of the powers that be and the rationality those powers so create, delineate, etc. such powers have enormous reach and influence...

another blessing to list would be the support network that beginning teachers have and/or should cultivate. support is so very important especially amidst the gloomy and/or darkest hours that one faces. encouragement and fellowship matter. much like the familiarity of a good red, for example, say the wonderful king's valley shiraz from de bortoli. ahr... the insouciance spiciness of such a classic shiraz, a wonderful comfort indeed! :DD

a wise teach said that it is important to cultivate two to three friendships wherever one might be. open up to them and yes, be prepared to be betrayed. perhaps, the underlying message is that there ain't no gain without risk. such friendships are essential to surviving in the profession. i shaln't elaborate further because to me, its rather explicit, the implications of friendships and relationships. its not what you know but who you know...

support takes many forms and shapes. some even point you to the appropriate resources, say "the one minute teacher" by spencer johnson. timely reading, an evergreen i dare say. apart from that, the tapping of the experience senior teachers who have weathered the myriad changes. they have much to offer... ...

of course, the perennial favourite: lie low, watch and observe. most of all, never personalise any evil that comes your way nor the urge to visit such revenge back but always be professional. easy to say but hard to practise. we're only humans afterall...

lastly, there will come a time (season) in one's life where one has to choose either one's career or sanity. are the tradeoffs worth it? much akin to asking yourself: do i want to drink the bad wine served and enjoy the ambience at the party OR should i switch a more suitable 'poison' that you will enjoy? afterall, the liver is gonna smashed regardless of the 'poison' selected so whatever goes down the gullet ought to be enjoyed. there is a price to pay for every 'yes' and 'no' uttered so do weigh your responses carefully before deciding.

well, those are some of the advice and/or observations i've received and noticed over these ten weeks. it definitely opened my eyes, corrobated my impressions and ideas about the service (expectations, demands, etc) apart from reinvigorating the importance of humbleness and a strong spiritual focus on the Lord especially when one is all at sea. am glad that its over. to the same wise teach (quoted above) that i met, thanks for ya advice. it was timely and invaluable...